Why We Don’t Have Everything

Someone on Justine Henin Official Site actually posted his thread as: Poetry in Motion

A couple of minutes ago, I read an article that has the line, a touch of poet. What struck me the most was something else he’d written. Basically; it’s the title of this entry.

Over a year or so, I’ve been honoured enough to know someone that has changed the way I approached life. Yet we’ve never even met. In her own way of doing what she loves most (playing tennis, that is), she has changed the way I look at defeat. And failure. And possibilities. And victories. All the areas in my life that needs molding here and there.

This is just a little snippet of the article I mentioned:

"If Henin looked like Maria Sharapova, no other female tennis player would get a look-in when it came to endorsements. Yet how wonderfully nature sometimes balances its gifts, endowing a statuesque supermodel-type with the most basic forms of weaponry while bestowing upon a plain-faced little woman the instincts and touch of a poet".          

courtesy of  http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/sport/2007/06/30/hard_case_henin_finds_the_touc.html

So… what happens when you have everything? And by everything; I mean EVERYTHING. Clothes. Money. Love. Beauty. Intelligence. Charm. Poise. Boat. Jet. Name one, it’s yours.

Facing defeat, Justine always says that while it’s disappointing, it’s already in the past. She regreted the fact that she couldn’t win the match, but she does not see her loss as something other than a motivation to get better results next year.

Wimbledon 2006 came in and out almost in the blink of an eye; and before I knew it there she was on the final. Having won the first set 6-2, I was beginning to feel a little bit relaxed. What follows was unpredictable and devastating. Runner up. I couldn’t believe it. I actually broke down and cried; didn’t even bother to see the trophy presentation. Couldn’t sleep. My mind was everywhere, like my brains were scattered. I couldn’t eat. When my stomach would began to growl like crazy then I know I have to eat something. What got me through was her interview. She completely realized what happened, regretted the fact that she couldn’t convert, but knows she has to keep working on her weaknesses to get better.

Achieving victory, she says she’s happy to have won it. It’s a great feeling to win. It reminded her why she loves to play tennis; to savour moments like those. To actually feel that winning feeling. Yet none of it matters if you don’t have someone (people) to share it with. Everyone who adores her knows what kind of ordeal she has to go through in her life. She married very young, at the age of 20, yet she found herself separated from her husband of 4 years, Pierre-Yves Hardenne.

Hence: Justine Henin -> Justine Henin-Hardenne -> Justine Henin.

She lost contact with the remaining Henin clan (her mom died when she was 12, and her elder sister died at 2); her brothers and sisters, and her dad; from about when she was 18. Reasons remain unknown. She’s private. All she has to say was that the turning point which lead to reconcilliation came the day she recieved a call from Sarah, her younger sister, telling her about David (her brother), had been in an auto accident and was in a comma. Went to the hospital she did. When her brother woke up with her standing beside his bed; the rest is history. The family has now reunited, and everyone can see how much happier she is now. At the French Open this year, after saying her gratitude for the reunition of her family, her other brother Thomas blew her a kiss from the stands. I, being the crazy fan that I am, had tears on the corner of my eyes. For never before (from the past two weeks of RG which I had to follow patiently from the internet and rely my sights to Roland Garros at Sports News) have I seen a more beautiful moment than that. Not even her backhand smash.

On possibilities, not once has she approached her match with an underestimating attitude. She always consider her opponent as the one who can actually gut her alive; the one who can take it all away from her. Mistakes? They happen. She’s improved her serves, and that came duly noted. In 1 match where she usually can have about 5 or 6 double faults; these days it’s 1 or 2 in each set. Sometimes 1 or 2 in each match. Finesse and focus, I think she’s the one you should look up to. If you’re a tennis fan.

Everyone refers to Mademoiselle Henin (and they still call her Madame Henin in some tournaments) as the Tiny Belgian. Or comeback queen (2004 Athens Olympic, where she won the gold medal. In the semis, it was 1 set apiece, with her down 1-5 in the third set. Her opponent only needed 4 points to win the match. Instead; Justine won the final set 8-6, and booked a place in the final. It was Belgium’s FIRST EVER gold medal). Or Queen of Clay. Or the 5"5′ woman who posseses if not THE best one handed backhand in the tennis game. Men’s and women’s. And (this is interesting), she loves to skydive. Like the Adidas slogan, Impossible is Nothing.

Dealing with failure, her statement could not be any simpler. It’s what you go through in life. Instead of over mourning what you failed to do, pack your bags and deal with life. Make it a chapter in your long biography.

So why is it that we don’t have everything? Why do we have to go trough what seems to be the most painful part of life? Why can’t we only have the good ones?

To balance it out. To give you a chance to see life from a different angle. A different perspective. And… most of all… to learn from other people. Just like I learned from Justine.

That ONE Moment

Kalo liat dimana-mana kesannya dunia emang bener-bener udah mau kiamat. Apa-apa beritanya bom melulu. Sini bom, sana bom. Negara ini nuklir, negara yang satu gak setuju. Negara ini terorisnya banyak, yang satu lagi orang-orangnya kerjaannya bikin rusuh negara sendiri.

Buat gue, yang notabene selalu mengikuti berita olahraga (gak semua sih, paling cuman yang gue suka aja); ada pelarian dari semua kegilaan yang ada sekarang. Ya berita-berita olahraga itu.

Pernah kepikir bahwa ternyata di dunia ini gak melulu diisi dengan yang negatif-negatif? Biar kata cuman seumpret, tapi tetep aja, buat gue itu ngasih kesan tersendiri. Berita olahraga buat gue merupakan HEADLINE HARIAN. Bukan berita sampingan. Justru yang penting-penting kayak masalah ini ono yang terus-terusan ditaro di halaman depan buat gue adalah berita tambahan. Ya, silahkan kalo mau nganggep gue rada-rada; tapi emang begitu kenyataannya. Dari sana gue tau bahwa at least masih ada yang indah n bagus. Yang bisa bikin orang nangis bahagia ato nangis sedih tanpa harus ada yang mati. Yang bisa bikin orang tereak sekenceng2nya dari lubuk ati yang paling dalem. Bukan gara-gara berhasil matiin banyak orang, tapi karena mereka dapetin apa yang jadi mimpi & cita-cita mereka selama jadi atlit. Beberapa fans bahkan mungkin tereaknya lebih kenceng dari si atlit-nya yang menang sendiri. Contohnya? Saya…

Intinya adalah di saat-saat semuanya terasa rusak n kacau n berantakan, masih ada kegiatan-kegiatan laen yang kasih kita bukti bahwa masih ada yang namanya bahagia bareng-bareng. Bahwa despite apapun, kalo elo emang mau jadiin lingkungan kita ini tempat tinggal yang tenteram, lo bisa lakuin itu, kok. Tanpa harus masuk ke bidang-bidang kayak politik gitu. Sebenernya gak cuman berita olahraga doang. Beberapa minggu yang lalu gue sempet liat festival persahabatan di Korea, n itu beritanya FULL SENYUM. Kesannya ramah n friendly, deh. Tapi kenapa gue kasih contoh olahraga? Simpel aja. Karena ini event yang paling sering gue liat; dimana suatu kejuaraan bisa ngerontokin hal-hal yang namanya rasisme dan segala macemnya. Emang hal ini gak berlaku di semua olahraga. Jangan ditanya kalo yang namanya sepak bola. Sodara aja bisa berantem gara-gara dukung tim yang beda.

Contoh paling blak-blakannya menurut gue ada 2: Golf n Tennis. Kalo golf, siapapun pegolf-nya, kalo elo bisa bikin birdie, ato eagle, ato hole in one (kagak ngarti juag apaan, cuman ya sering denger, lah…); yang nonton pasti bersorak. Jarang ada fanatisme kalo sepengeliat gue. Jadi yang nonton ya ngikutin sapa aja dah yang bisa diikutin, gitu.

Kalo tennis, yang sering gue liat adalah begini: biarpun awalnya elo ngedukung si A, tapi kalo akhirnya si B yang menang; mereka (yang nonton disana) dengan sportif mau ngasih applause buat yang menang. Emang sih ada beberapa kasus kalo yang menang itu diledekin; cuman itu jarang kejadian lah. Paling-paling itupun kalo yang menang nyolot. Ya, jangankan di olahraga… kalo di sehari-hari aja nyolot pengen dijotos.

Udah lama sebenernya gue pengen nulis blog ini. Dari sekian banyak berita yang gue liat, cuman dikit yang masih bikin gue ketawa-tawa. Dan masih bikin gue nyadar kalo ternyata masih ada sesuatu yang tersisa dalem diri kita-kita manusia, selaen yang jelek-jelek yang selalu diekspos n selalu jadi berita utama. Kita pengen berbagi kebahagiaan. Dan berita-berita kayak gitu punya suatu kesan tersendiri di hati gue. Bahwa dalam saat itu, even though cuman beberapa menit, kita, dunia, bisa berbahagia bersama.

Interview: Part 5

Q: Hello!

A: Hi!

Q: It’s certainly been  while…

A: Yes, I know. I have a lot in my mind, but I just didn’t have the time.

Q: I understand. How’s everything going so far?

A: Pretty good. School’s over now; so that’s great news… um… yeah, basically a lot happened. Some good things, others were bad things, but… this is a good week for me. So far it has been pretty good, I’d say.

Q: Why so?

A: Well, Justine won. So…. that was like the highlight of my day. Couldn’t stop smiling. When the radio team cried, “It’s over!” I practically screamed and came this close to crying. I was so happy.

Q: That’s a very good news. How’s college going?

A: I don’t wanna talk about it right now.

Q: We’re not going to make progress if you won’t tell me what’s going on. College is your main issue right now, correct?

A: Yeah, but…

Q: Why don’t we just… try? Slowly…

A: Ok. Um… I got into dentistry. And I still struggle a lot with my dad about the faculty. I don’t want to go to state uni, but I don’t want him to see as if I didn’t try hard enough, you know? I don’t want him to see that I’ll fail on purpose. So I had to enroll in an intensive program… I still got, like, one more uni I’m going to try to enroll. I’ll have the test on Monday… so we’ll see.

Q: Are you still worried?

A: Not really. You know? Right now it’s like, “I already have a university, so I pretty much don’t mind,” kind of a thing. As long as I work hard at it I’m gonna go through it just fine, I think. It’s just that… if I do get accepted at this last uni I’m about to have a test next Sunday, I’ll probably gonna go there.

Q: Okay… what about other problems? Have you had any sort of… you know, emotionally, how’s everything holding up?

A: Hahaha… to tell you the truth I’m kinda a mess about the emotion thing right now. My temper rises and falls like crazy. I get mad so easily… the happy thing just kicked in as soon as Justine won. I got offended very easily, you know, I have no idea what’s going on right now…

Q: There must be a reason to that. What have you done all these times?

A: I don’t change my routine much, you know? But… I think my old habit’s kicking in again, and that made me break. So to speak.

Q: Which one?

A: I lie. And I lie, and I lie, and it just goes on. I mean, you know, I lied about going to church. This is the one that bugs me the most. I feel so… humiliated. You know, when you feel like you’re very sinful? You kinda hate yourself for that, and that’s exactly what I feel.

Q: And the thoughts?

A: Oh, they’re very vocal. I think this is the phase where they’ve been the loudest.

Q: Are they good? Or bad?

A: It’s kinda both. Like, when I lied about going to church, there’s this whole thing inside of me, telling me how sinful I was, and that, if I have the time, I should go to church, you know?

Q: What did you do?

A: I ignored it. I mean, I completely shut it all down, kept it to myself, didn’t do anything to fix it. And it went away; but I just know that if I keep on doing what I did, I’m gonna be lost once again.

Q: Well it’s good that you understand that very well. The important thing is not to do that again. Ever. I’m not going to give you a preach, and I never intended to do so in the first place. But, don’t do wrong if you know it’s wrong, ok?

A: Okay.

Q: Now… what’s your highlight? What made you savour your moment of living?

A: [smiles] I knew you were going to ask that. Um… seeing Justine’s acceptance speech. You know, she won for the 4th time, and seeing her giving the speech was a great feeling for me, even though I didn’t understand mostly what she said. And… you know she had a falling out with her family? But they patched things up, so her siblings were there; her brothers and her sister. She dedicated the win for them, and she said she missed them a lot. And then the camera took a shot of them, and I saw her eldest brother, and he blew her a kiss. You know when you witnessed a moment, and you cherised it with all your heart, but there are no words to describe how it made you feel? That was just it. And I watched it and I cried, out of happiness. It was the greatest thing, and… I’m lost for words right now. It’s just… great.